February 7, 2009 - Denial, Part II
BREAKTHROUGH ADDICTION RECOVERY HOUR
FEBRUARY 7, 2009
Brian: Good Afternoon Atlanta welcome to the Breakthrough Addiction Recovery Hour my name is Brian Fujii and my co host is away today but we are going to continue our subject of denial I also have two special guests today to discuss our new programs at Breakthrough Jeff and Scott. We are looking forward to hearing from them and this exciting program and what we are going to talk about. Last week we talked about denial and denial is basically a common defense mechanism that everyone uses to some degree, do you remember that, getting caught in the cookie jar. It is a common characteristic of individuals struggling to determine if they need help in recovery. We know that denial can take up many forms and there is the excuse that I am not drinking that much, or blaming others. We know denial truly blocks individuals from getting the help that they need and a study that was done in 2001 they say about 5 million people that need and did not received treatment and estimated 77thousand needed treatment for the drug problem. Some made efforts but were unable to get the help they needed.
For those in recovery we need to be able to extend the hand of help to them. There are some out there coming through the holidays and they know they need help and don’t know what to do. If you need support or a way to help yourself get through a problem with alcohol or drugs, I know that a big problem we face is opiate use also, pain killers and more and more they are addicted. Take a look at Atlanta you know that opiate addiction is prevalent and is becoming a large problem. Alcohol throughout the holidays many relapse and get drunk or get in trouble, give us a call. 770-226-0920. Are you in a position of denial?
I will share again the difference between using, abusing and also becoming dependent. When you are using alcohol or drugs you are using it in a way that is not causing any problems and we do know that there are those that drink responsibly but then there are others that have problems with drinking and now having problems with the spouse and difficulty with the job. Take a look at your life, do you experience discomfort when you don’t drink or take the drugs. Do you have tolerance to the drug or drink and you need more and more for the desired effect? Then the biggest thing is continuing to use despite the consequences. If this sounds like you give us a call at 770-226-0920 get in on the conversation and let’s talk about it.
Jeff and Scott, we are so glad to have you here today and I know that you are going to be talking about your experiences and I know that you are willing to share your journey in recovery and the work with SMART recovery program. Jeff tell us about SMART>
Jeff: Brian SMART Self Management and Recovery Training. IT is based on four points being. 1.motivation to stay sober, control cravings, solve problems without drug and balancing long and short term satisfactions by following a path based on ones higher values. Going through every day life and coping with it.
Brian: Values, we do teach and train at Breakthrough and help people to understand that many many times when you move into alcohol or drug abuse that their value systems begin to diminish and when I talk of values I mean honesty openness and communication. How does SMART help our folks to maybe understand how these diminishing values to reclaim them
Jeff: It is a program where it is fellow recovery helping each other cope and look at the beliefs and being able to dispute them and then work through them and having a lot of others we brainstorm and the help is valuable to coping for the recovering addict.
Brian: Skills, learning to adjust
Scott: SMART has a lot of good tools that the facilitators utilize to help guide the individuals on their way through the recovery process it is a peer led group and we dsit down and discuss events of the week and the upcoming struggles are out there and we try to take them down one at a time and look at the best way to deal
Brian: Again, it is a process that people are every day trying to improve their ability to stay in recovery and guys lets talk about the idea of denial and we know that denial is huge and that befoe people get into treatment and dthe word is ready they have different stages of readiness and help people understand that readiness is very important and even though someone else wants them to do it are they ready? Briefly before a person knows there is a problem, do you remember that?
Jeff: Yes I do, and it stays fresh in my mind because you have to stay motivated when you are in recovery and that is very important and even though you have not gone through major consequences it doesn’t mean you aren’t headed for them.
Brian: 770-226-0920 we are going to go to a break so give us a call and we will be happy to answer your questions.
Commercial Break
Brian: We are back and welcome to Breakthrough Addiction Recovery Hour and we are with Jeff and Scott talking about the new group called SMART recovery in our offices at Breakthrough today at 5pm, 8000 Miller Court East in Norcross go to the website at breakthroughaddictionrecovery.com.
Jeff and Scott are with us and we were discussing how someone begins to see that they may have a problem and the role that denial plays in this process. Blaming and putting things off. The second phase is contemplative and this is where someone is beginning to think that they could possibly be headed for a fall. You know they get tired of the arguing at work, at home. Jeff or Scott do you know that point at which you ask that.
Scott: I would say foremost is that I put down my camera and I am a wanna be photographer and I love taking pictures but I realized I had not picked it up in over four months. I realized that there was something wrong and I knew I was using heavily but I thought I was in control and could stop any time. I think the thing for me was when I was at the liquor store too often and having to find time to shop for it and then started buying by the case and that was a wake up call for me and I knew the thoughts were haywire and I had a problem.
Brian: Again, just the fact that that was in front of you and so what we see here is the evidence produced itself and something needed to change. Did anyone say anything to you to help you think about this and you are picking up a case and not a bottle did the family or friends say anything to you or get you to see.
Scott: Not really, I drank alone and isolated myself and put myself in situations so I would be alone. My wife did have an idea that something was wrong but I had been sober for 8 years and relapsed obviously and she did not believe that it was possible for me to go down the same road so she was in denial and that didn’t help at all either. I thought I could control this all along. WE were in double denial
Brian: This is a powerful thing, several hundreds of people saying to themselves and they may be thinking that they can casually drink, what do you say
Scott: In my case I was sober for 8 years and it did start with one and I justified with the 8 years of sobriety and thought I would be safe. I did not have the capacity to go there again, but I was wrong. It started a couple a day and then another or two and felt fine and before I knew it I was drinking vodka and as I said it happened so quickly from a pint to considering buying it by the case.
Brian: 770-226-0920 outside the area 1-888-920-2665 if this is touching you and you have someone that needs to hear this please give us a call. These two guys here can really give some insight, Jeff and Scott have gone through this and can help.
Jeff: Brian we have a lot of different tools to offer at SMART. You can dispute the irrational beliefs of alcohol but and learning how to use these tools help you cope with some of your urges and cravings and deal with them without going down that road.
Brian: Disputing a thought is very powerful and that is a tool. Let’s think about that and when we come back we will talk about it. 770-226-0920 give us a call
Commercial Break
Brian: Welcome back we are talking about how denial gets in the way of getting the help you need, the lies that you tell yourself and then the way to get help. We know many right now are looking for help and if you are seeking treatment and need a place that is supportive and educating and getting medication to help with cravings you need to visit our website at breakthroughaddictionrecovery.com. You will find a host of information regarding the programs and how different types of drugs impact the brain and it is a tremendous website filled with information and also we will talk about SMART recovery. That is one of our programs and is not unique to us but it is a national program available to all. Tuesday at 7:30 PM, Thursday 6:00PM, Saturday 5:00 PM. I hope that you will take advantage of this opportunity and it is free.
So, Jeff and Scott we were talking about how a person can stop the thought of drinking and the scenario was someone wanting right now to stop at the store and pick up something they think they need, how can we help them dispel that thought.
Jeff: A technique we learned is urge surfing and you take your thought and you play it all the way through and look at all the consequences that will come to be after making that choice and they can go way beyond that to a DUI or you know you wake up the next morning with a sick headache miss work get fired and it is a great technique and one of the keys is you have to make sure you play the tape all the way through and
Brian: Excellent. We do encourage the client to call someone before they drink, once they use they have already made a decision and that is important. Call before you use.
SMART is a national program and many states have it please tell us how they can find it in their area.
Jeff: You can go to www.SMARTrecoveory.org and that is the online website and if you are feeling timid about the meeting they have a couple of meetings on line and they have a chat meeting and they also have voice sessions where you can share and talk to others that are recovering as you are. They also have the chats and that is helpful to a lot of people to deal with their problems. This is a great alternative to some meetings.
Brian: 770-226-0920 if this discussion is hitting a mark give us a call and we will be right back.
Commercial Break
Brian: Tell me Jeff I know that there are many ways to get online with the chat rooms for SMART recovery and actually doing the voice communication is this something that is available 24 hours a day or just particular days.
Jeff: There are several moderators that keep the conversation going in a positive direction and on the website you can find literature and they have loads of motivational stuff and you can find face to face meetings in your area and find ways to contact us too.
Scott: You can go to the SMART recovery website and click on meetings and it will prompt you to the meetings in Georgia and that will even show you our part in this and
There is a variety of information for other locations also. There are email addresses to the facilitators and we would love to answer your questions and are anxious for your input.
Brian: Jeff you just finished a training to be a facilitator. Tell us about what is involved with that.
Jeff: It is a six week on line class, 90 minute sessions and how to run a quality smart meeting and has great information from directors, etc., and is extremely helpful to learn how to run a quality program.
Brian: I like the words quality program. I notice the smiling faces at our place when they attend a SMART program.
Scott: When someone comes in to a meeting there is no intimidation and it is very comfortable non confrontational and you are welcomed then we bring everyone up to speed on SMART and the tools we use and then what we do is go around the room and check in and that entails your first name what brought you and what you would like to work on and after that point we take some of the more unanimous problems and we will focus on those and come up with ways to deal with it on a daily basis.
Brian: 770-226-0920, if you are just tuning in we are talking about denial and getting that loved one into treatment. Jeff and Scott are here to talk about SMART recovery.
Let’s talk about another program we offer and that is Families in Recovery and so if you are a spouse or parent or sibling of someone struggling to stay in recovery this is just for you. It is a completely free program every Tuesday evening from 6pm to 7:30 led by Dr. Lois Dutton and it is a support group and you can share about your life and the struggles you are facing and what some of the hurts area and what confusions you face as you help someone stay in recovery or get into recovery.
Scott: Denial can sneak up on you uh it is not something that is blatant it is very subtle and it is difficult to isolate because of that.
Brian: Subtle, how did that hurt your marriage.
Scott: Well, we were not communicating she was denying that I had a problem and then I couldn’t believe I was headed there either. Communication being cut off was serious problem.
Brian: I appreciate that where you understand denial is relationship disruptor.
Commercial Break
Brian: 770-226-0920 that is the number to call we are talking about SMART recovery
And as we come down to the end of our program we want to remind everyone of the times that these meetings occur. SMART recovery meets at Breakthrough Addiction Recovery on Tuesday evenings 7:30, Thursday 6:00, Saturday at 5:00. Our Families in Recovery meets on Tuesday evenings at 6:00 pm led by Dr. Lois Dutton. We hope that the show today has been informative to you and has helped others cope in their journey to stay on the road to recovery. I will be back next week with my cohost Jill Mattingly and until then thanks for listening.