BREAKTHROUGH ADDICTION RECOVERY HOUR

FEBRUARY 7, 2009

Brian: Good Afternoon Atlanta welcome to the Breakthrough Addiction Recovery Hour my name is Brian Fujii and my co host is away today but we are going to continue our subject of denial I also have two special guests today to discuss our new programs at Breakthrough Jeff and Scott. We are looking forward to hearing from them and this exciting program and what we are going to talk about. Last week we talked about denial and denial is basically a common defense mechanism that everyone uses to some degree, do you remember that, getting caught in the cookie jar. It is a common characteristic of individuals struggling to determine if they need help in recovery. We know that denial can take up many forms and there is the excuse that I am not drinking that much, or blaming others. We know denial truly blocks individuals from getting the help that they need and a study that was done in 2001 they say about 5 million people that need and did not received treatment and estimated 77thousand needed treatment for the drug problem. Some made efforts but were unable to get the help they needed.

For those in recovery we need to be able to extend the hand of help to them. There are some out there coming through the holidays and they know they need help and don’t know what to do. If you need support or a way to help yourself get through a problem with alcohol or drugs, I know that a big problem we face is opiate use also, pain killers and more and more they are addicted. Take a look at Atlanta you know that opiate addiction is prevalent and is becoming a large problem. Alcohol throughout the holidays many relapse and get drunk or get in trouble, give us a call. 770-226-0920. Are you in a position of denial?

I will share again the difference between using, abusing and also becoming dependent. When you are using alcohol or drugs you are using it in a way that is not causing any problems and we do know that there are those that drink responsibly but then there are others that have problems with drinking and now having problems with the spouse and difficulty with the job. Take a look at your life, do you experience discomfort when you don’t drink or take the drugs. Do you have tolerance to the drug or drink and you need more and more for the desired effect? Then the biggest thing is continuing to use despite the consequences. If this sounds like you give us a call at 770-226-0920 get in on the conversation and let’s talk about it.

Jeff and Scott, we are so glad to have you here today and I know that you are going to be talking about your experiences and I know that you are willing to share your journey in recovery and the work with SMART recovery program. Jeff tell us about SMART>

Jeff: Brian SMART Self Management and Recovery Training. IT is based on four points being. 1.motivation to stay sober, control cravings, solve problems without drug and balancing long and short term satisfactions by following a path based on ones higher values. Going through every day life and coping with it.

Brian: Values, we do teach and train at Breakthrough and help people to understand that many many times when you move into alcohol or drug abuse that their value systems begin to diminish and when I talk of values I mean honesty openness and communication. How does SMART help our folks to maybe understand how these diminishing values to reclaim them

Jeff: It is a program where it is fellow recovery helping each other cope and look at the beliefs and being able to dispute them and then work through them and having a lot of others we brainstorm and the help is valuable to coping for the recovering addict.

Brian: Skills, learning to adjust

Scott: SMART has a lot of good tools that the facilitators utilize to help guide the individuals on their way through the recovery process it is a peer led group and we dsit down and discuss events of the week and the upcoming struggles are out there and we try to take them down one at a time and look at the best way to deal

Brian: Again, it is a process that people are every day trying to improve their ability to stay in recovery and guys lets talk about the idea of denial and we know that denial is huge and that befoe people get into treatment and dthe word is ready they have different stages of readiness and help people understand that readiness is very important and even though someone else wants them to do it are they ready? Briefly before a person knows there is a problem, do you remember that?

Jeff: Yes I do, and it stays fresh in my mind because you have to stay motivated when you are in recovery and that is very important and even though you have not gone through major consequences it doesn’t mean you aren’t headed for them.

Brian: 770-226-0920 we are going to go to a break so give us a call and we will be happy to answer your questions.

Commercial Break

Brian: We are back and welcome to Breakthrough Addiction Recovery Hour and we are with Jeff and Scott talking about the new group called SMART recovery in our offices at Breakthrough today at 5pm, 8000 Miller Court East in Norcross go to the website at breakthroughaddictionrecovery.com.

Jeff and Scott are with us and we were discussing how someone begins to see that they may have a problem and the role that denial plays in this process. Blaming and putting things off. The second phase is contemplative and this is where someone is beginning to think that they could possibly be headed for a fall. You know they get tired of the arguing at work, at home. Jeff or Scott do you know that point at which you ask that.

Scott: I would say foremost is that I put down my camera and I am a wanna be photographer and I love taking pictures but I realized I had not picked it up in over four months. I realized that there was something wrong and I knew I was using heavily but I thought I was in control and could stop any time. I think the thing for me was when I was at the liquor store too often and having to find time to shop for it and then started buying by the case and that was a wake up call for me and I knew the thoughts were haywire and I had a problem.

Brian: Again, just the fact that that was in front of you and so what we see here is the evidence produced itself and something needed to change. Did anyone say anything to you to help you think about this and you are picking up a case and not a bottle did the family or friends say anything to you or get you to see.

Scott: Not really, I drank alone and isolated myself and put myself in situations so I would be alone. My wife did have an idea that something was wrong but I had been sober for 8 years and relapsed obviously and she did not believe that it was possible for me to go down the same road so she was in denial and that didn’t help at all either. I thought I could control this all along. WE were in double denial

Brian: This is a powerful thing, several hundreds of people saying to themselves and they may be thinking that they can casually drink, what do you say

Scott: In my case I was sober for 8 years and it did start with one and I justified with the 8 years of sobriety and thought I would be safe. I did not have the capacity to go there again, but I was wrong. It started a couple a day and then another or two and felt fine and before I knew it I was drinking vodka and as I said it happened so quickly from a pint to considering buying it by the case.

Brian: 770-226-0920 outside the area 1-888-920-2665 if this is touching you and you have someone that needs to hear this please give us a call. These two guys here can really give some insight, Jeff and Scott have gone through this and can help.

Jeff: Brian we have a lot of different tools to offer at SMART. You can dispute the irrational beliefs of alcohol but and learning how to use these tools help you cope with some of your urges and cravings and deal with them without going down that road.

Brian: Disputing a thought is very powerful and that is a tool. Let’s think about that and when we come back we will talk about it. 770-226-0920 give us a call

Commercial Break

Brian: Welcome back we are talking about how denial gets in the way of getting the help you need, the lies that you tell yourself and then the way to get help. We know many right now are looking for help and if you are seeking treatment and need a place that is supportive and educating and getting medication to help with cravings you need to visit our website at breakthroughaddictionrecovery.com. You will find a host of information regarding the programs and how different types of drugs impact the brain and it is a tremendous website filled with information and also we will talk about SMART recovery. That is one of our programs and is not unique to us but it is a national program available to all. Tuesday at 7:30 PM, Thursday 6:00PM, Saturday 5:00 PM. I hope that you will take advantage of this opportunity and it is free.

So, Jeff and Scott we were talking about how a person can stop the thought of drinking and the scenario was someone wanting right now to stop at the store and pick up something they think they need, how can we help them dispel that thought.

Jeff: A technique we learned is urge surfing and you take your thought and you play it all the way through and look at all the consequences that will come to be after making that choice and they can go way beyond that to a DUI or you know you wake up the next morning with a sick headache miss work get fired and it is a great technique and one of the keys is you have to make sure you play the tape all the way through and

Brian: Excellent. We do encourage the client to call someone before they drink, once they use they have already made a decision and that is important. Call before you use.

SMART is a national program and many states have it please tell us how they can find it in their area.

Jeff: You can go to www.SMARTrecoveory.org and that is the online website and if you are feeling timid about the meeting they have a couple of meetings on line and they have a chat meeting and they also have voice sessions where you can share and talk to others that are recovering as you are. They also have the chats and that is helpful to a lot of people to deal with their problems. This is a great alternative to some meetings.

Brian: 770-226-0920 if this discussion is hitting a mark give us a call and we will be right back.

Commercial Break

Brian: Tell me Jeff I know that there are many ways to get online with the chat rooms for SMART recovery and actually doing the voice communication is this something that is available 24 hours a day or just particular days.

Jeff: There are several moderators that keep the conversation going in a positive direction and on the website you can find literature and they have loads of motivational stuff and you can find face to face meetings in your area and find ways to contact us too.

Scott: You can go to the SMART recovery website and click on meetings and it will prompt you to the meetings in Georgia and that will even show you our part in this and

There is a variety of information for other locations also. There are email addresses to the facilitators and we would love to answer your questions and are anxious for your input.

Brian: Jeff you just finished a training to be a facilitator. Tell us about what is involved with that.

Jeff: It is a six week on line class, 90 minute sessions and how to run a quality smart meeting and has great information from directors, etc., and is extremely helpful to learn how to run a quality program.

Brian: I like the words quality program. I notice the smiling faces at our place when they attend a SMART program.

Scott: When someone comes in to a meeting there is no intimidation and it is very comfortable non confrontational and you are welcomed then we bring everyone up to speed on SMART and the tools we use and then what we do is go around the room and check in and that entails your first name what brought you and what you would like to work on and after that point we take some of the more unanimous problems and we will focus on those and come up with ways to deal with it on a daily basis.

Brian: 770-226-0920, if you are just tuning in we are talking about denial and getting that loved one into treatment. Jeff and Scott are here to talk about SMART recovery.

Let’s talk about another program we offer and that is Families in Recovery and so if you are a spouse or parent or sibling of someone struggling to stay in recovery this is just for you. It is a completely free program every Tuesday evening from 6pm to 7:30 led by Dr. Lois Dutton and it is a support group and you can share about your life and the struggles you are facing and what some of the hurts area and what confusions you face as you help someone stay in recovery or get into recovery.

Scott: Denial can sneak up on you uh it is not something that is blatant it is very subtle and it is difficult to isolate because of that.

Brian: Subtle, how did that hurt your marriage.

Scott: Well, we were not communicating she was denying that I had a problem and then I couldn’t believe I was headed there either. Communication being cut off was serious problem.

Brian: I appreciate that where you understand denial is relationship disruptor.

Commercial Break

Brian: 770-226-0920 that is the number to call we are talking about SMART recovery

And as we come down to the end of our program we want to remind everyone of the times that these meetings occur. SMART recovery meets at Breakthrough Addiction Recovery on Tuesday evenings 7:30, Thursday 6:00, Saturday at 5:00. Our Families in Recovery meets on Tuesday evenings at 6:00 pm led by Dr. Lois Dutton. We hope that the show today has been informative to you and has helped others cope in their journey to stay on the road to recovery. I will be back next week with my cohost Jill Mattingly and until then thanks for listening.

BREAKTHROUGH ADDICTION RECOVERY HOUR

JANUARY 24, 2009

JILL: Hello Atlanta I am Jill Mattingly the Director of Operations at Breakthrough Recovery here in Atlanta, Welcome to the Breakthrough Addiction Recovery Hour.

For those of you listening on line, welcome we will have a great show today because if Dr. Dutton brings her game we will have fun.

Lois: I am already here Jill, no bribery

Jill: Dr. Lois Dutton is one of our premiere educators and therapists at Breakthrough and we are going to talk about the theme Denial. We will not use the Egypt joke the whole hour and if you call in and force us to use it maybe, but no Egypt joke just denial. Before we do that we have to do in the news……when you look for it you will find it, and I found the addiction story today. The magazine is financial because that intrigues me

Lois: This makes me nervous when you do this

Jill: if it is a reputable magazine, it was talking about sin stocks, sin, that exists? I guess alcohol, tobacco and casino stocks anyways they said in the article that vice or sin stocks are safe in this economic environment. When people need fast money this is the place they put it because they are going to cut back on their spending but not their addiction especially in a very pressured time and it is bucking the trend. This recession is showing a difference and these stocks are taking a hit too. It may be the companies and their debt that has piled up so they are like the banks and everyone else. I am not going out there as an employee of Breakthrough I can’t buy alcohol stock and feel good about myself.

Lois: Well at least sin is losing and that sounds very interesting.

Jill: The last sentence says that maybe people have finally decided to clean up their act I just don’t believe this Lois and coming in contact with people really struggling, I just feel like it is getting worse and it will get worse before it gets better. The financial environment and losing jobs lots of stuff going on.

Lois: You are right and I think that folks are still going to look for ways to make things feel a bit better the

Jill: The ultimate self medication. WE are talking about denial and that is the title of our show and while it can go in many directions please stay tuned to see what direction we take it. 770-720-0920 or 1-888-920-2665 and the number from your cell is 770-226-0920 and if you want to call someone outside the area, tell them to tune in on the computer at www.wgka.com/listenlive. We found quite a few definitions of denial we found are like the first one here. Refusal to acknowledge to acknowledge the unpleasant external reality or internal feelings. This is one way to explain it and I thought that the external reality could be I loose my job but I am still going to purchase things I won’t be able to afford. That is an extreme and when it comes to addiction it is more difficult and

Lois: For years those of us in the field of addiction and not just the treatment folk but those who loved individuals that are involved over this and those that work with them have puzzled how someone could just ignore what is so obvious that the results of the drinking and drugging has called so much difficulty and the person is oblivious to the situation. Opening your eyes is not that simple, denial is a protective mechanism and we all have shades of it. It is not letting yourself be open and vulnerable and that is impossible. They try to make it more paletable and it can get so sever so that they don’t recognize reality. Our purpose is a form of minimizing and saying that it is really not that bad, or because I haven’t acknowledged it it doesn’t exist.

Jill: When faced with uncomfortable facts you will instead insist that it is not true, so you decide what you are faced with is not true and even in overwhelming evidence says it is. It has to be a defense mechanism to protect us from melt downs if you will and I think of horrendous things such as a terrible injury in war or other things and they don’t even acknowledge the fact as if it didn’t happen. This is a disconnect in the brain.

Lois: Denial is so much a part of the addiction process that it is even considered putting together symptoms to come up with a diagnosis. Individuals despite the evidence the obvious continue to use at a level that is detrimental to them. That is a part of it, denial is not used in the diagnosis and there you know it is implied.

Jill: That to me is an amazing thing and being a person that enjoys brain research to look at how in the world can a brain do that type of behavior and knowing it will destroy it lives in and so how does that happen and the research is out there and I will bring some of that up after the break. Please call and just share comments or questions 770-226-0920, and we also can be found on the web at breakthroughaddictionrecoveory.com we have so much information on the website and you could find pictures if you dug in too. I don’t put it out there for obvious reasons. Don’t call to the website and look at all the information we are talking about every type of information. 7702260920 is the number you want to call we will talk.

Commercial Break

Jill: Welcome back to the Breakthrough Addiction Recovery Hour, I am your host Jill Mattingly and I am with my special co host Dr. Lois Dutton, our topic today is denial and not the one in Egypt. I say premiere therapist what does that mean? First?

Lois: I will deny you said that (laughter)

Jill: Denial as it pertains to alcohol dependency and abuse and drug addiction and even coming down to opiate addiction and I would like to talk about that in a segment in the next few minutes. Those struggling with pain med addiction and how denial can work with you to the point it becomes much bigger than you bargained for. I thought we would do this segment Lois by asking does this sound familiar? What does denial look like. There are common statements and if you are someone who is having trouble with drugs or alcohol and I want you to hear what we hear all the time in treatment.

Lois: “I have an excellent record and never missed a day of work because of my drinking,” that would be the most common.

Jill: I just heard that one too. “I have a B average and just cause I do meth on the weekends doesn’t mean anything.”

Lois: “I can stop any time I want to.” The other is “I am not that bad.” “I haven’t had a dui or been in jail”

Jill: Operative word is “yet” the

Lois: This is the one that makes us mad, they say “I am not hurting anyone but me.” The other is “I have to drink because it is part of my job and I have to entertain my clients.” That is just the excuse.

Jill: I want the listeners to know that if you have heard this in your own home or friends or relatives and you want to call please do or if you have heard other types of denial we want to hear from you if we haven’t mentioned it this time. 770-226-0920 that number again is 770-226-0920 and if you call we will put your denial excuse on the air and talk about it and you know the one is always, “I don’t have a problem” then they qualify like the good grades, no job loss, no dui, I am in good health, this is all of the “haven’t happened yet.”

Lois: When we see people and they always have the hesitation in the voice but they know they have the nagging possibility that because it hasn’t happened does not mean it isn’t just around the corner

Jill: Also it doesn’t have to be someone in the office obviously if they felt that way they wouldn’t come in unless dragged in. We have a lot of family members say they want help because their family member is in denial and through the family education or families in recovery we can teach them how to address this with the loved one. Also living through someone in denial

Lois: The power of denial does bleed over into the family and family members can also perpetuate the stories and we see it all the time where um, it is just so difficult when you are in relationship with someone drinking or using and it is hard to be the messenger to the individual and to keep saying to them “Your drinking is causing the problem…then comes the denial and they accept the lame excuses. That is what you really want to believe. A piece of the whole denial is that we often wonder why they don’t learn from their mistakes.

Jill: We have a caller, Bob in Atlanta, Welcome Bob

Bob: How are you

Jill: Great, the sun is out and we aren’t in denial

Bob: The thing is that my family has gone through this, I have been in recovery for 30 years and Bob is not my real name, and around this and my sense is that what the problem is that everyone in order to qualify and go to program or mental health you have to hit a really low bottom and I think that just because we don’t know and after 30 years you finally get to the fact that there is a whole in my soul and it takes a long time in sobriety to find out I survived a lot of the time and I didn’t want to go back out again. It is just that when I think culturally we get so injured early in life and don’t know it and um, what we are doing to our kids is just creating addiction and the denial is not so much for the addict it is the enablers too. I really appreciate your show because you don’t hear this very much and my main concern is how low the bottom has to be before you say you have a problem and that is the root of denial

Lois: I agree Bob, a bottom for one person doesn’t have to be as devastating or catastrophic and what we attempt to do and in AA or helping roles what we do is help people create a bottom for themselves so that they don’t loose everything before getting something done.

Jill: The enlightenment goes a long way, so far back, we use cognitive therapy which is peeling back layers in a slow manner so that it is an all of a sudden a shock in our therapy we do a lot of educating so that individuals can get their heads wrapped around the process they are dealing with and the better off you are to manage it going forward, that is a big piece of the program.

Bob: I just wish there are well, our schools and churches are failing because people go to church and you feel like you are the only one and and every congregation is loaded with people suffering from substance abuse.

Jill: Bob we are coming down to a break um, I would like to thank you so much, your call has probably gotten a lot of folks thinking about denial so thank you and keep listening, we will be right back 770-226-0920

Commercial Break

Jill: Welcome Back we are talking today about denial and the role it plays with someone who needs treatment for drugs or alcohol abuse, 770-226-0920 and you can get in on this conversation. Breakthrough Addiction Recovery Hour, you ,now what, denial can go on in many types of addiction we see devastating effects from gambling, sex, things that can cause just havock in lives and families, we have a call from Mary in Kennesaw.

Mary: How do you get someone out of denial

Lois: this is a personal situation? Drinking and drugs,

Mary: he is an alcoholic

Lois: I’m sorry first of all there comes a time when individuals who love the person around them have to do what we call tough love and I know that is a term that is thrown around but it is simply a matter of no longer allowing an individual to operate as if there are no consequences to the behavior that he or she is going through. It is a matter of responsibility just know that. It is a lot easier said than done and it is easy for me to tell you this but I know that it works and I have seen it time after time where you choose and communicate to them that you choose no longer to sit by and participate and it is not a part of your commitment or your love for them to sit by and watch them head down a road of devastation and catastrophe. I think that is the strongest thing you can do is simply say I choose not to do this any longer. I will not

Mary: Um, I never see him drink. He won’t drink in front of us and he won’t drink in front of family and I have written to him and have well he is in denial

Lois: So he doesn’t believe there is a problem

Lois: You and others feel that he does

Mary: yes, he has already been in jail

Lois, you communicated to him that he does have a problem and it is serious and simply again reiterate to you that you not participate anymore and you are not going to allow him to push you in the corner where you perpetuate the denial

Jill: Have you sat down as a family to devise a plan? It really isn’t like the show Intervention but the family as a whole is a powerful statement. At Breakthrough calling and talking to a counselor about how to organize that it might really help you to start down the road of not feeling powerless and I can hear it in your voice over this person and their decision and what they are doing, you can make some steps to feel like you have more power in this situation and especially how you will respond to it.

Mary: I would love to get some help

Jill: Any place where the family can present a united front

Lois: Just tell him what I said earlier, you are here for him but if you continue to deniy that there is a problem then here are the conquences.

Mary: What are the conquences

Jill: That is where the family comes in and you have to put this down on paper, go to our website, www.breakthroughaddictionrecovery.com. The person on call is the one that can help you set up an intervention. Would you like the number?

Mary: yes

Jill: 770-734-8091 and he will help you walk through this, I want to thank you for making a difference by calling today, We are coming to another break so hold the next call and we will get it when we return.

Commercial Break

Jill: 770-226-0920 is the number and we are a call in show, The Breakthrough Addiction Recovery Hour, my name is Jill Mattingly and with me today is Dr. Lois Dutton and we are talking about denial. Not much time left but we are making headway talking about the different situations, let’s go to Mike in Marietta

Mike: Well I have been drinking and would judge due to dui and jobs, etc., and then it dawned on me that I needed to do something.

Jill: We will be the first to say, fantastic, the first step is definitely admitting that it is a problem and laid it down but the journey is beginning a

Lois: The phrase is this is the first step and that is to stop drinking and you are from our perspective you are beyond an acute withdrawal of any kind physiologically but keep in mind that we are talking about an addictive process and Jill, I can see her

Jill: Think about this a `12 pack a night you have a tolerance to the substance and you have inherited the ability to break down alcohol and coming out of 8 days you are out of acute withdrawal which is the first 72 hours. You are however in post acute withdrawal and I wouldn’t be surprised if you aren’t irritable. We think you need more information and you can get more through AA or other types of support systems but also to get information which is what you find in treatment individual therapy or education about alcohol and how it effects you and is insidious and worked it’s way into the thought processes.

Mike: I can make a lot of arguments in my head that make sense and then I think I can just do it and not let it get out of hand.

Lois: There may come a time where your blood sugar thing the adjustment that your body is making to not pouring this alcohol in on a daily basis and going down the road to get yourself some stop gaps.

Jill: Talking to your buddies and if they are supportive or treatment and ask what worked for them and if you are looking for something we can do a free consultation for you to get you walking through this and you can get close to slipping so you need a good support group

Mike Give me that number again.

Jill: 770-734-8091 and someone is on call to talk with you today. Breakthrough Addiction Recovery and Mike if you don’t come to us please get yourself entrenched in good therapy or a good alcohol program even if it is AA meetings and getting that support you need. Thanks for calling you made a difference.

Jill: We have seen some wonderful calls today and if you want to get one in call us at 770-226-0920 and we will talk about some of the brain research with denial. It could be your brain!

Commercial Break

Jill: Welcome Back to the Breakthrough Addiction Recovery Hour, I can’t believe that I have not mentioned our newest group at Breakthrough. We have a free program and it meets in one hour in Norcross Georgia called SMART Recovery and you can check it out it is national and we are the only facility housing these meetings. SMART Recovery.com and you can check it out and look at what they talk about in their support group and it is a free support group fantastic people and fantastic form of support

Lois: Meets three times a week, Tuesday at 7:30, Thursday 6:00, Saturday 5:00

Jill: I wanted you to know and anyone listening a lot of what we are talking about today, the guys and girls will tell you all about denial and especially Mike if you are listening that might be a neat support program to be involved with and not a hit on your wallet.

Jill: Last segment we talked about the brain, I am a brain junkie and I love brain research and Norah Volcow and Dr. Paul Earley and I get really into this, one thing going on is looking at insight deficit which might explain drug addiction and when you look at them and they are putting a needle in the arm and scars and absesses something is wrong and there is a serious disconnect and they are looking at it like schizophrenia, there might be the same area in the brain effecting the consequence or the reality of what the addiction is doing to you. What they are seeing is that if they can get a handle on this they might be able to tweek treatments to help people grasp the gravity of the addiction and I think that you know I pray that that does happen because this is so devastating and there is a time element involved you cant stay addicted for more than a certain amount of time. You will see the physical consequences, so there is a time constraint and it is important to see how we can get into the brain and turn denial into acceptance.

Lois: We want to leave folks remembering that addiction is an illness and has consequencial problems with it. Continuing to blame others is not helping the problem it is only feeding the denial and pushing away the help that you need. The other thing is that you can’t shoot the messenger, they are coming to you and trying to help and that is what they want to do and help individuals get into treatment and the earlier you come the earlier you can make the decision that you want to stop and come into treatment and you can be successful.

Jill: Very well put, that is what this is all about, fighting denial on every front. We are at the end of our show, thanks for tuning in and we will be back at 3pm on Saturday and there is a replay on Sunday at 6pm here on 920, www.breakthroughaddiction recovery.com and we welcome you to come in for a free consultation. Let the light shine into your life and the denial is not a river in Egypt. I got it in there

Lois: You sure did

Jill: We will see you next time.